I just got a new webcam 
to be honest, I think my scanner gets lonely
It's not a very bright computer peripheral
It gets jealous: they can’t stand the sight of each other
[the scanner] just doesn't feel important anymore.
Most users don’t even think about such things.
[but] you can have a keyboard lockup, all your data lost 
or, worst case scenario – damaged motherboard
from an [angry] scanner
You really can make friends [with your scanner]
by scanning very interesting samples
[so] I just collect images from all over: 
daily media, 
old books from thrift shops, 
and now off the net too.
and I wanted to let you in on the secret. 
Watch ALL bizarre images created from destruction.
[this] also allows for complete [scanner loyalty].